The Hostess

The room was beautifully lit and decorated. People all around were showing their teeth, irrespective of whether they really felt any emotion at all. But majority were actually happy for the newly engaged young couple. And the couple was of course full of smiles for the flashing camera that just didn't leave their side.

In the midst of all this happiness no one noticed how hard she was trying to smile.

She stood in the corner whenever she could get away without anyone noticing. She was as cordial and as attentive as a hostess should be. She took the compliments that came her way with a gracious smile. She made sure that all her guests were comfortable but then she took her recluse in that small corner where she could allow the smile to falter or disappear completely for a while and be at peace with just herself.

She looked at the blissful couple laughing and pulling each others' leg and felt a real smile tug at her lips. She couldn't have been more happy for them. She had seen them together for 6 years now, it was about time that they made it official.

The to-be-groom was her cousin, the closest thing she had to a brother. So today was supposed to be a perfect day. And yet something tugged at her heart when she saw them together.

She couldn't really place it. Maybe it was because he would soon be someone else's and she might lose her place in his life.

She watched her cousin sister stand in the middle of her brother's friends, laughing a fake laugh, trying to enjoy when it was all she could do to not run away. Stealing glances at the bride-to-be with a hint of jealously at how pretty she looked that day.

As the hostess watched this she smirked again but this time in mockery. She could never understand what women envied in one another. She personally never had.

She looked away from all the laughter and false, nervous smiles of two very different families meeting together. Hoping they liked each other, knowing they never will and yet pretending like they had tried. As if you didn't have enough extended family members you had to be cordial with, that now a whole new bunch was added!

She shook her head at the disgrace of it, smiled quickly when an older relative passed by her, and then looked up to stare at the beautiful crystal chandelier on the ceiling. It looked so beautiful with the glittering crystals and the mild clinking of them together.

She felt peace as she stared at them. The crystals made a little noise as they clunk together and they were all of different shapes, equally sharp but when looked at them together, as a whole they looked absolutely breathtaking.

That's when she turned and stared at the entire room, as a whole, and for the first time instead of individuals with their stupid giggling to nothing, she saw a family. Albeit a big one with a sizable number of sharp edged crystals that definitely clinked when put together, but they still looked beautiful as a "whole". She looked at the bigger picture for the first time.

A fresh smile appeared on her face and this time she could keep it for the rest of the evening without a complaint. Nothing had changed except her sight. And that had made all the difference in the world.

Someone came up to her - "This party is amazing. You make a great hostess"

Yes I do, she thought, I brought the crystals together, I created this sight of them shining together. "Thank you" she said with the same smile but only now she actually knew what she was thankful for..

Spin it out!!

A typical day at work, I'm sitting editing an article, listening to music, with Gmail, outlook, my blog and other windows open simultaneously. And suddenly there is a power cut.
All of us immediately save our work and switch off our PCs because there isn't much UPS backup.
Following that, for the 1st 15-20 minutes, it felt okay I guess because I sat to read the paper, the main stories of HT, DNA and the Times (all pretty much the same). Followed by my horoscope of course!
Then I began to get a little bored, so I decided to pick up my cubical phone and call someone. But my colleague told me that the phone line doesn't work either, because there isn't any electricity.
Great. I can't waste my cell phone balance, I am not that bored! Yet.
After a total of 30 minutes of nothing to do I began to actually miss my work, which I already did but by now I desperately wanted to get back to it. Damn the power cut!
And that's when it struck me that we were so dependent on the electricity. We need it for our PCs, the Internet and yes the phone too! So what do we do now? Completely handicapped.
No, I tell myself, I am going to get over this technology, electricity driven disability. I can write, right? Why not start a new article on paper?
I open my diary and stare at the blank page. I tell myself "Really?? What are you going to write? You cant edit anything, your article is in the PC and you cant write anything new because you have no research material. Who are you kidding? Shut the damn book!" And so I did.
I tried putting my head down on my desk and sleep but I was half scared that my boss might find me asleep on my desk on my fourth day at work!
So I turn to see what my colleague was doing and I was suddenly very aware of my chair- Hey! this goes round and round!
I hadn't really taken advantage of that! So in the end I resorted to the most childish thing, something that I used to simply love doing when I was younger. Spinning in my chair!
I ended up spinning for the next half hour that we were free. It was totally worth it even though I ended up feeling really giddy. It was fun!
Felt amazing to be a kid again and believe me the real enjoyment is in being like one!
Sorry Electricity bhaiyya, I could have fun even without you.. ;)

Take it or Leave it- It's not about YOU

"I don't have an attitude, just a point of view that others simply can't accept"

It's not about what you think of me,

It's about who I am,

It's not about what you perceive, don't care

Take it or leave it, what I am is what I am.

I don't need you sitting around me,

Telling me what you see wrong in me

I have gotten this far being exactly this

And shall progressively continue, you make no difference.

It's amazing how quickly it comes to judge,

When perfection is nowhere near you.

And yet pointing fingers is characteristic,

It is of course the easiest, cowardly thing to do.

It doesn't really matter even if you mean well,

Constant pessimism isn't healthy, it points to hell.

If that is where you wanna head, wont stop you,

Who knows? Someday I might join you there as well..

I do not care enough to make you change,

Those who matter aren't quick to judge me this way,

I only sit here and pity your negativity,

It doesn't reach me but burdens you heavily..

Over-the-counter Engleesh

I am standing on this side of the counter chatting with my friends in the usual hinglish and he's on the other side yelling people's orders, cracking a 'sardar' joke or two with his colleagues.

But the minute I face him across the counter he goes

" Hello ma'am, good afternoon, what can I get for you?"

Even if it's in the most unbelievable accent you have heard!!

Then I reply after a brief discussion with friends, " 2 Mac veggies, a coke, and a Mac puff please."

Him- "Of course ma'am.. yada yada yada.. please enjoy your meal ma'am and have a nice day!"

Oh I will, I just heard you struggle with a language, mispronounce it and sing in an accent.. My day just brightened up.. (Sigh!!)

Why this formality of over-the-counter English? When clearly the option of another language exists. We could have easily conversed in Hindi or Marathi (ask any Thakeray!).

But let me remind you its not just his job requirement, it becomes a compulsion for you to reply in english too, whether you can speak it or not.

I remember this one guy who was standing in front of me once in the line and was completely taken aback by the attack of english.

"Will this be a take away or would you be eating here sir?"

Now so far the conversation had no words that he couldn't understand, but suddenly there was 'take' and 'away' and an 'eating'? His face clearly said 'wasn't everybody eating??'

But he replies, ".. umm.. ya.. actually..."

"Here or takeaway sir?" the server continues sadistically.

"Here, here" the poor guy finally manages.

He gets an extra smile from the server for the two minute entertainment at that guys extra perspiration and discomfort. When the guy grabs his order and turns to leave, he sees me, his embarrassment increases, he goes pink and shoots.

I turned, sighed and watched as the server looked after the guy with a dejected shake of his head (probably for my benefit) as if not knowing english will kill the guy.

It probably might, but not here in a damn MacDonald's outlet. I mean Cm'on! Get real!

Knowing any language is good but knowing when to switch is even more important and appreciated. Let's cut those who don't know English some slack guys, its not a crime. Nor a compulsion. The language doesn't always matter it's more about 'what' is communicated.