Parents are not always right. They don't always know what they are talking about.
We always believe its the teenager who is going through some adamant phase and that they will hopefully come around.
But why cant it be the other way round? Parents can go through their own adamant phases. Phases where they simply refuse to look at things from a different point of view.
The main problem with parents most of the time is that they believe they have to be right. Maybe because they are older, or more experienced or because they believe they know you or they know what's best for you. But quite often than not, they are pretty confused themselves. They don't know what they are talking about and choose to disagree with the children simply because children are always wrong, they just cant be right can they?
If you try and help its interfering, if you stay out of the house you're never there, if you talk and contribute you are interrupting, if you don't talk then you're not sharing!
Soma parents just get it all wrong.
The basic problem is, its not about understanding your child its about first understanding yourself.
Your baggages, your frustrations, your irritations all gets bottled up and thrown at your adoles
cent kids. Because you assume that by now they should be able to deal with it.
But surprise! This is the worst time in a maturing child's life where he has barely understood himself and his problems revolve around image consciousness, acne, crushes, clothes and the likes. His personality is still raw and he is already dealing with a lot of changes inside and around him.
Parental ego, unfortunately, wont allow parents to accept that they could have misunderstood or for that matter not understood at all. To top that growing older brings emotional havoc, hormonal issues and physical frustration, things that the adolescent is also going through simultaneously. Which ultimately leads to the volcanic eruption when struck together.
At this point of time your child doesn't need another baggage hurled at him from the home front. And then when he distances himself from home, starts cutting himself from you, shows you his irritation it becomes too much for your superiority to appreciate and that's how the wars begin at home. Sometimes resulting in permanent damage. If you are lucky things may smoothen out in a couple of years when both mature a bit, but during the process you never know how deep the scars have gone and how long the grudges can be held.
Parents are older. More mature and generally know what is right. But they are after all human beings and are entitled to be wrong once in a while.
There's no harm in being wrong, what is simply required is that both parties have the humility to accept it when they do. Parents especially, as they need to set the example. Your children are not that foolish, give them some credit, they are after all your own flesh and blood. Whatever qualities are there in them have come from you!
We always believe its the teenager who is going through some adamant phase and that they will hopefully come around.
But why cant it be the other way round? Parents can go through their own adamant phases. Phases where they simply refuse to look at things from a different point of view.
The main problem with parents most of the time is that they believe they have to be right. Maybe because they are older, or more experienced or because they believe they know you or they know what's best for you. But quite often than not, they are pretty confused themselves. They don't know what they are talking about and choose to disagree with the children simply because children are always wrong, they just cant be right can they?
If you try and help its interfering, if you stay out of the house you're never there, if you talk and contribute you are interrupting, if you don't talk then you're not sharing!
Soma parents just get it all wrong.
The basic problem is, its not about understanding your child its about first understanding yourself.
Your baggages, your frustrations, your irritations all gets bottled up and thrown at your adoles
cent kids. Because you assume that by now they should be able to deal with it.But surprise! This is the worst time in a maturing child's life where he has barely understood himself and his problems revolve around image consciousness, acne, crushes, clothes and the likes. His personality is still raw and he is already dealing with a lot of changes inside and around him.
Parental ego, unfortunately, wont allow parents to accept that they could have misunderstood or for that matter not understood at all. To top that growing older brings emotional havoc, hormonal issues and physical frustration, things that the adolescent is also going through simultaneously. Which ultimately leads to the volcanic eruption when struck together.
At this point of time your child doesn't need another baggage hurled at him from the home front. And then when he distances himself from home, starts cutting himself from you, shows you his irritation it becomes too much for your superiority to appreciate and that's how the wars begin at home. Sometimes resulting in permanent damage. If you are lucky things may smoothen out in a couple of years when both mature a bit, but during the process you never know how deep the scars have gone and how long the grudges can be held.
Parents are older. More mature and generally know what is right. But they are after all human beings and are entitled to be wrong once in a while.
There's no harm in being wrong, what is simply required is that both parties have the humility to accept it when they do. Parents especially, as they need to set the example. Your children are not that foolish, give them some credit, they are after all your own flesh and blood. Whatever qualities are there in them have come from you!
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