The child in Me

All your life, as you are growing up you often hear these repeated lines from parents, elders, damn friends too.. "Stop being immature!" , "You are 20 stop behaving like a kid!".. Both the words immature and childish are for some reason used in the same breath or in the same context. I never really cared until I learnt, in my later years in school, that 'maturity' was something very important and that it was something crucial to define your mental age. Well, now I couldn't have someone assume I'm immature could I? But at the same time I didn't really feel like giving up my childish endeavors.. Really in a pickle don't you think? I assumed being mature was acting all grown up all the time.. Now that is just too boring a feat, even today I can't stand that!
So I chose to continue being the way I was and if someone dared to call me immature I would prove to them otherwise.
Maybe I took it too close to heart coz no one really ever challenged my maturity.  People only called me childlike and many were amused at my childish pranks and would laugh with me as I found great joy in things like jumping in puddles, eating an ice-cream, ogling at a plane passing over head, blowing bubbles, etc.
Over the years I found that things that I knew about myself but couldn't really define were very beautifully defined by the people around me who were close to me. I remember in FYJC I had a friend who was definitely what one can define as 'mature'. She once simply out-of-the blue said to another friend in front of me "Mon is so cute, she gets excited at the smallest things! Doesn't take much to keep her happy". I didn't really understand why that line made me so happy then, but I did feel elated. I recall the smile I exchanged with her and have not forgotten the line since.
I keep realizing how true the line is even today. And according to many this is the child like nature in me. So does that make me immature? Many might consider it to be so. 
When I entered my degree college I began getting very enthusiastic about a career in journalism, and decided to read as much as I could and analyze everything around me, so I found myself pondering many things within myself too. In a class full of insecure people who learn to stand up by pulling you down, you get a lot of fingers pointing right at your face. Some maybe poke you in the eye too!! When your feet aren't secure on the ground you might find yourself slipping quite a bit. I found myself landing right on my butt quite a few times! But I suppose the process it takes to pull yourself together taught me a lot about people around me and more importantly got me to look deeper within myself. At my weaknesses and my strengths. That was when I learnt what the difference in being immature and being childlike was. Able to be mature and childlike as when I wished was my strength but not being aware of that was my weakness.
Most of the time my weakness has been that I am usually not aware. Maybe because I prefer living in a nice little cocoon filled with only the little things and people that make me happy, but when you go out to face the world that simply isn't enough.
So I put on my thinking cap, in fact barely ever took it off, and started my everlasting process of understanding myself and the world. May be I took it a tad too far (always go to extremes), but anyway I got a pretty good hold of myself and began to cement my feet securely on the ground. I started looking deeper into what people said. And at times found really golden sentences which, again, I haven't forgotten.
Like once this woman who runs a parlor, and acts as a mother to all her girls that work there, gave them this random but very practical advice - "If your feet are securely firm on the ground, irrespective of whether people praise or demean you, you have nothing to worry about. If they give you foolish criticism just smile at them coz you know you are better. Plus the smile will drive them crazy! And at the same time when you are praised simply smile graciously do not let it get to your head."
Very beautifully put. Sure I simply couldn't just smile in either scenario (still can't!) but what she said made a lot of sense, and sometimes I do resort to it or at least try to. And it is amazing how much peace it gives you just because YOU are sure.
So people today can go 'immature' or 'childish' or 'child like' or whatever, it doesn't bother me much because I am pretty sure what it is that I am.
People have an unfortunate need to define everything and categorize things for their own convenience, I do it too. Pretty much the start of being opinionated and judgmental. Can't really blame anyone. So the pointing fingers will continue, there's no real need to bite their fingers off or start lamenting, we all do it. Just pray others don't bite at you for judging them and all will remain well! ;)

You are you irrespective of whether even you understand it, forget others. Just enjoy being yourself. The day you are uncomfortable with being who you really are, change for the better. Like I really dunno why I jump at the idea of chocolate ice-cream, become breathless when I see my crush ;), why my heart melts when I sense someone simply feels sorry even if they don't actually say it, love watching Ernie and Bert or - Ooo a plane just went by! Wow...!